What are the three greatest evils facing America today?
Well, since baseball season is over and the Boston Red Sox have imploded, the answer to that has to be the Nebraska Cornshuckers, the Notre Dame Fighting Evils and the Alabama Crimson Crud. All men and women of goodwill join in denouncing that evil regardless of denominational or political affiliation.
We know that in a fallen world, injustice often prevails and evil prospers. I’m used to that, especially in college football. I never believed the church would go through the Tribulation, but I think most scholars would agree that the last several years when SEC teams have won national championships is likely evidence that we may well be already in that awful time, the Great Tribulation. There is ample evidence that SEC, translated into ancient Sumerian hieroglyphics and viewed numerologically would become 666.
I understand that in evil times evil happens.
But yesterday was just about more than I could bear. Nebraska looked like it was going down in a flurry of justice until a referee stepped in (probably one of Nicolae Carpathia’s lackeys) and threw a flag for a pass interference that did not actually take place. The Cornshuckers won. Then, Notre Dame was down 14 in the 4th and came back to tie. The Pittsburgh kicker had a (slightly more than chipshot) field goal to drive a stake in the heart of evil and schtoinked it wide right. The Fighting Evils won. And then the Crimson Crud was beaten, when LSU (a school which de-emphasizes academics to the point that its fans are unable to spell the word “go”) lays down and lets Alabama have the game.
It was more than I could bear.
Is it possible that Nicolae and his minions are plotting for BCS Armageddon, pitting the Al-oBAMA Crimson Crud against the Notre Dame Fighting Evils for the national championship?
What a day of horror that would be for men and women of goodwill.
Of course, all of this is meant in a spirit of unity, charity, and mutual edification.
Them that can, does.
Them that can’t, blogs, gripin’ about it.
“And then the Crimson Crud was beaten, when LSU (a school which de-emphasizes academics to the point that its fans are unable to spell the word “go”) lays down and lets Alabama have the game.”
Well, Dave, I like you, but that just isn’t true. For one thing, LSU has a fine academic program for a state school. For another thing, they played their guts out and Alabama just made the plays at the end. Two great teams went at it and unfortunately, the hated Crimson Tide won a game where they were the inferior team in everything but the score. But, alas, that is all that matters. We’ll get them next year.
You see, Dave, SEC fans get this. Every game is a war. We don’t score 60 points because either the defenses are too good or we let the pedal off the gas because we know that next year, the team we beat could turn around and do it to us.
5 of the top 8 teams in the BCS are from the SEC after 10 weeks of the college football season. Not much more can be said.
I have always known Alan Cross is an extremely intelligent man.
Here is another fact all you Lesser Conference guys should ponder.
If all elected leadership of the United States were graduates from SEC institutions of higher learning the United States would still lead the free world in all things and no one would be unemployed and the national debt would be zero.
Another fact is that if any one of the head coaches from any SEC FOOTBALL NATION became POTUS, we would all be living in fields of ambrosia and everyone would be driving American made cars and wearing American made clothes and eating American grown food and there would be no foster children because all the men would be real men and treat their wives and children right and work for a living and stay home at night and do the right thing and they would all be conservative Southern Baptist and all the liberals would move to France.
CB: That is Gung Ho enthusiasm for one’s football team, if ever I saw it. I had to laugh. Thanks for the relief from the tedium of blogging.
Thanks James,
Sometimes it is good to just laugh. it helps me often and it really does not cost that much.
🙂
Why is it that in a sports context, these terms mean their exact opposites?
Beware this false prophet, and Go Bama! #RollTide!
😉
I’d like to see Bama’s overrated defense try to stop the Oregon Juggernaut.
Blake,
How is it possible, according to the standards by which FOOTBALL NATIONS are rated, that the CRIMSON TIDE could be overrated?
Right! It is not possible.
Blake, I know Dave Miller is a BUZZARD-EYE. Therefore, I understand his pain, sorrow, and poor attitude toward FOOTBALL UNIVERSE greatness.
Tell me in which of the Lesser Conferences do you now live so I can better understand your inability to appreciate the vast magnitude of the SABANATION’s greatness?
Bama came into that game with a defense allowing an average score of 8 pts/game, 203 total yards of offense/game, 57 yards rushing/game, and 146 yards passing/game. In that game Bama’s defense gave up more than twice their average so far in the season all of those categories. In that game, LSU’s offense played unusually well surpassing their own season averages in total yards and passing yards. Here’s the kicker: LSU is the 71st best team in total offense in the country. Bama’s #1 because they’ve played a downy soft schedule. Their defense would be annihilated by a real offense. I suspect this will be shown to be exactly the case next week when Texas A&M comes to visit.
Still nurturing a grudge that Alabama beat MSU last week, but they have redeemed themselves somewhat by beating LSU, a team which should be defeated in every contest.
Chris Roberts,
MSU and LSU are both SEC NATIONS. No SEC NATION should “be defeated in every contest.” That is absurd to even suggest and evil to harbor in one’s heart.
SEC NATIONS should win every contest outside the ranks of the SEC. When playing one another, the best NATION should prevail. Of course, there is one exception. The SABANATION is to win every contest. And of course, as we all know, they do.
If justice prevailed, LSU would go 6-6 every year, so as to be bowl eligible and put a thrashing on some lesser conference’s champion.
Doug Hibbard,
Such would be a wonderful world.
The perfect world would be for a SEC NATION to win the national Championship every year from now until the end of time. That would keep the Sport of FOOTBALL pure and undefiled.
I realize that the SABANATION can’t win it every year. So it would be fine with me if it rotated between ARKANSAS, TENNESSEE, GEORGIA, and ALABAMA. We Sabanites have never been greedy for all the glory, ’cause humbleness is our greatest and most noticeable virtue….other than being the best at anything we do, of course.
As for the SWAMP-LIZARDS of LSU, well, maybe we might cheer for them to win a national Championship about once every 12-15 years. After all, they are part of the family, even though they are often rude and have terrible table manners at holiday family gatherings and picnics. But I tell you what. Those Louisiana folks sure can cook.
Man, lots of LSU non-love around these parts. They fell short last night and Bama had the higher score but was not the better team. But, all that matters is the score of course, so all respect goes to Bama. Next year, these two will go after it again in another classic contest, I am sure.
But, my lack of affection for Alabama grew exponentially last night, just as my respect for their football team grew as well.
My sister finds me odd as well. She insist one must always root for the SEC team when playing non-SEC, even if the SEC team is LSU. I must disagree. I’ll root for MSU first, SEC generally second (with one exception), and *anyone* playing LSU third.
Chris Roberts,
I guess it just goes without saying that you sister has taken the moral high-ground between the two of you.
Does your sister by any chance live in the virtuously inspiring SABANATION? Such character is rare outside Sweet Home Alabama.
She’s among the biggest MSU fans you’ll find. She even still believes.
Chris, you need to get over your LSU hate. It is not good for your soul.
What isn’t good for my soul is that LSU exists on the same world as my soul. But there is hope: I have every confidence that LSU (the abstract entity, not individuals) will not be dwelling in the same spiritual locale as me in the next world.
Chris, you sound like an Ole Miss fan. 🙂 I’m from Louisiana and a life-long LSU fan, but grew up in Mississippi, so I went to school at Miss. St. This will probably blow your mind, but I love both schools/teams, although I am a slightly bigger LSU fan, so they get my emotional tie, while State gets my alma mater allegiance for all but one game each year – the one coming up this week. I was such a huge LSU fan as a kid, that when I went to school at State, I couldn’t just quit on my Tigers. So, I created this strange, dual fandom that has worked for me pretty well for all but one game per season. This is my week of angst.
Well, the only thing better than LSU losing, is LSU losing to MSU, so this will be a truly joyful weekend.
YES!!!! Wow!!!! Happy Days!!!!! Love it, love it, love it !!!!!!! JOY!!!!!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?NR=1&v=XNA6pxZLCyo&feature=endscreen
‘Well I remember the leaves a fallin’
And far off music like pipes a callin’
And I remember the golden morning
I saw the long ranks as they were forming
And there’s a magic in the sound of their name
Here come the Irish of Notre Dame
The pilgrims follow by the sacred waters
And arm in arm go the sons and daughters
The drums are rolling and forward bound
They’re calling spirits up from the ground
And there’s a magic in the sound of their name
Here come the Irish of Notre Dame’
There is a reason that SEC teams get ranked ahead of west coast teams with gaudy uniforms and allegedly unstoppable offenses. The SEC’s thugs are bigger, stronger, faster and more talented. Think NFL caliber defensive linemen.
Texas A & M found religion and joined the SEC. They lost to Florida, an offenseless team with a good defense. A&M lit up the scoreboard all the way to 17 points. Lost to LSU but almost hit 20 points…but I’m glad they are in the SEC.
Oregon’s juggernaut would turn to naught. Notre Dame is soft in several ways.
The Dawgs will likely face Alabama in the SEC title game and will be a several touchdown underdog. The Tide is good.
The SEC would lock down the top five every week but they have to play each other.
I commend Dave for being anti-Notre Dame and Nebraska. That goes a long way towards redemption for his being a Yankee fan.
William Thorton is a son of a SEC NATION and a man of true wisdom and with vast experience in a multitude of serious matters not known to most of you from among the Lesser Conferences.
You all should take heed to what this great man says and ponder it deep within your cranial crevices.
It’s about time SOMEONE brought a little fashion sense to the football world. Oregon isn’t gaudy. They’re well-dressed.
As to the “alleged” unstoppability of their offense, Oregon has consistently put up the big numbers–yesterday it was against the pre-season favorite USC. USC scored how many points? 51. 51!!!!!! And they LOST!!!!! A&M scored almost 20 points and lost to offenseless Florida. Impressive? Not even. But USC, the pre-season Numero Uno came up short while scoring 51 points! I pray that the eyes of your hearts (and those in your heads) will be opened to the glory that is the PAC 12.
As I’ve noted elsewhere, Alabama’s schedule is front-loaded. They’ve played all the good teams. Oregon’s schedule is back-loaded. They still face 2 ranked teams. With solid wins and big numbers in those games they will secure their rightful place in the National Championship game.
Notre Dame can’t beat Alabama. Kansas State can’t beat Alabama. A&M is the only hope for an upset, but I’m not sure that’s at all promising. Alabama’s Crimson Tide will roll to an SEC title. The only offense that can match up against Alabama’s defense is the “alleged” Ducks juggernaut. End of story.
Dale Pugh,
There is a factor here that only those of us who live in the FOOTBALL Capital of the FOOTBALL UNIVERSE, Alabama, understand.
The last game of the season for the SABANATION is the AUBURN NATION.
All the folks living in Alabama know that it does not matter if AUBURN has lost most every game of the season. When the CRIMSON ELEPHANT meets the TIGER OF THE PLAINS, anything is possible.
The SABANATION can never take the AUBURN NATION for granted in any year no matter their record. The same is true when AUBURN is having a great year and BAMA is in the tank.
Also, the AGGIE NATION is not going to be a weak sister. They will come to T’town this coming Saturday with their boots on and sabers sharp. You can count on that.
However, you are right about one thing here. The SABANATION faced some tough opponents in the beginning…..and we are yet, undefeated.
…and Kansas State, please, let’s be serious here (although I love them for beating Oklahoma).
I pull for anyone playing the dark, evil teams of our world….which are Notre Dame; Dallas Cowboys; New York Yankees; and any team playing the Vols.
David
I’ll be glad, when we can get past this football claptrap and get tot the main show, Basketball, the ACC and UNC-Ch.
SEC envy is an ugly thing.
Just sayin.’
David
I DO DECLARE, i THINK YOU FOLKS HAVE TAKEN LEAVE OF YOUR SENSES. No wonder the SEC has become a great system of idolatry that only the ACC is going to overcome.