This post was originally published at sbcIMPACT on January 14, 2009. Since then, I have had some health problems and can no longer call myself “the best conditioned morbidly obese man in America” – plus that sumo guy did that marathon a couple of weeks ago anyway. But I am approaching this from a self-control perspective and trying to do something about the problem. All you young guys, remember this: it’s a LOT easier to keep the weight off than to take it off. Hope you enjoy this!
Everywhere I go I carry with me a public testimony to my failed struggle with self-control. I am more than 100 pounds over the recommended weight for a man who is 6’4”.
It has been a frustrating battle. I have lost around 800 pounds on diets, only to have those pounds return with a few of their friends. I have exercised strenuously. No kidding, folks! I have ridden RAGBRAI twice. That’s a seven-day, 500-mile bike ride across Iowa. And I still gained weight. I have completed a marathon in each of the last 3 years, and still gained weight. I have sometimes referred to myself as the best conditioned morbidly-obese man in America.
On a positive note, it was hilarious when I came around the bend to finish my last marathon. It was the Bataan Memorial Death March in White Sands, New Mexico. You cross a desert and go over a mountain and finish on the White Sands base. The looks on the faces of the people as I neared the line were priceless. “Look, Eunice, Do you think the fat guy really did the whole race?”
I did the Death March on March 30th. A few months later, I tipped the scales higher than I had ever weighed. I have lost the battle.
Why? Why can’t I lose the weight and keep it off? It’s my metabolism, right? Thyroid? A trip to my family reunion might give me a genetic excuse. But really, in my heart I know the answer. My metabolism and genetic makeup may be contributing factors, but there is something more to this.
Simply put, I lack self-control. Do you realize how many calories you have to consume to complete marathons and still gain weight? I have trouble controlling my desire for food. When I start eating, I have trouble stopping.
Like many fat preachers, I have joked about my weight and been the object of many jokes. I’m not that sensitive about it. But I read a verse today that struck me to the core. It is 1 Corinthians 9:25-27. In this passage, Paul describes the life he has lived in the service of God. “Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath.” Great champions discipline themselves to train for a goal – a championship, a contract, fame and glory. Paul adds, “But we (exercise self-control) to gain an imperishable (crown).” He controlled his body and its desires so that he could serve God more fully and faithfully. The passage then concludes with these words. “So I do not run aimlessly. I do not box as one beating the air. But I discipline my body and I keep it under control, lest after preaching to others, I myself should be disqualified.” Wow!
I know that I am saved by grace and that God loves me the way I am. But I am also coming to realize something I don’t want to admit. When I stand in the pulpit on Sunday with buttons popping, I am in a very real way undermining my own credibility.
Dr. Howard Hendricks shared a story with us in seminary. He was talking to a man who struggled with drunkenness. “God can give you the power you need to control your desire for alcohol,” he asserted. It was then that the Holy Spirit whispered in the back of his minds, “How can you tell him that when you have no control over your own appetite?” He took that message seriously and lost the extra weight.
I was at a state pastors’ conference, and there was a speaker from Lifeway. My BMI (Body Mass Index) is ridiculously high, but I doubt that I was in the top 10 at that meeting. This man got very direct with us. He told us (in much kinder terms) to get up off our lazy backsides, exercise a little, and eat a salad now and again. He went over all the ill effects of obesity and how it is hurting pastors, raising Guidestone’s insurance rates and generally wreaking havoc.
I know all this. I can’t even play a game of basketball anymore. My knees hurt and walking up a flight of stairs is a challenge. My asthma kicks in and I can barely breathe. I have to sleep with a C-PAP machine. Yet, knowing all this, I have continued to give in to my physical desires and eat too much. I’m looking into forskolin fuel for weight loss, as always I’m optimistic.
Here’s my point. I’m not looking for sympathy (or the secret to your diet success, please!) I am using my own experience to make a point. My lack of self-control is not funny, though I have made thousands of jokes about it. My lack of self-control is no one else’s fault but my own. I cannot blame it on anything or anyone else.
I need to treat this issue as what it is – a spiritual battle. I cannot excuse it, rationalize it, justify it or make light of it. It is an important spiritual issue. Paul brought his body under control so that he would not undermine his credibility and integrity in any way. When I stand before my people in obvious obesity, I am not giving testimony to the life-changing, power-giving, desire-controlling power of the Holy Spirit.
The good news is found in Galatians 5:22. “The fruit of the Spirit is…self-control.” If I will walk in the fullness of the Holy Spirit, he will empower me to control the desires of my body. If we preach transformational power to the adulterer or drunkard, we should also preach it to the obese.
I am looking forward to the day I can stand before my people and demonstrate to them that the Holy Spirit can give them control over their bodies and their physical desires. “I used to be morbidly obese,” I will say. “But God renewed my mind and helped me to see this in a different light. Then, the Spirit empowered me day by day to make wise and healthy choices and that is why I am only two-thirds of the man who used to stand in this pulpit.”
Wouldn’t that be better than making jokes about my weight?
Amen and amen.
There are often sacred cows in our churches and our thinking, things we will not touch despite the apparent hypocrisy in our thinking. The most recent I’ve seen: churches taking stands on sexual sin (homosexuality) while having, during the meeting, single pregnant women in their choir who are living with their boyfriends, male church members.
The standards that apply to use of pornography, alcohol, gossip, and anger (i.e., a little self-control) are the same that apply to this topic, food. I think you have shown courage and transparency by addressing this in such a fashion.
As for truth in advertising, I am just now getting my snacking under control, and have seen a loss in weight. I do not have the large battle before me that you face, but only in terms of degree.
Keep fighting.
Jeremy,
When you said, “There are often sacred cows in our churches…” were you making a pun?
😉
ROFL… that was awesome Mark.
That would be a sacred fried chicken.
Just because people are too scared to confront them, doesn’t mean we need to call them names.
No, I wasn’t.
And while we’re in the humor section, let me just say we should not be making light of such a weighty an issue.
And all joking aside, I am actually rendering lard this evening.
I started gaining a lot of weight (over 100 pounds) after being treated for sleep apnea. My wife said before that my legs were never still and I basically made running motions in bed all night long. After getting my CPAP not only do I sound like Darth Vader when I’m sleeping (which is SO cool for an auditor), but I don’t run a marathon. So, add to that my love of all foods and I’m a big ol’ bald headed boy now.
However, I made a conscious decision a few months ago. I banned ice cream from the house. For me, it’s like alchohol to an alchoholic–I can’t have it in the house, period. Then, I started working out 3 days a week and for the first time in 6 years when I went to the doctor I had LOST weight.
Now, I didn’t make this choice because of any guilt on my part about my weight. I mean, I’ve heard blog commenters make the moronic suggestion that Baptist churches have no right to preach against homsexuality until there are no fat people in church. However, I do recognize that my body is the temple of the Holy Spirit and I’m not sure the Holy Spirit needs all this room. Plus, I’d like to stick around and see my kids get married one day. So I’m trying to do better.
Joe,
Forbidden items in my house include your ice cream, and Little Debbie Cake Rolls :-). Some things, if you have them, you’re going to eat them.
David R. Brumbelow
I usually keep a box of Little Debbie’s hidden in my desk drawer at the church. I do pretty well at making them last for over a week and even giving them away some. You might not want to come visit me at the church. 🙂
Jeff,
Now that I know, you don’t want me coming to visit you at your church :-). A box of Little Debbie Cake Rolls lasting over a week? I’ve never heard of such a thing.
David R. Brumbelow
David,
I will make you a deal. If you are ever in the great northern expanse here just below the Canadian border in my little corner of North Dakota, you are certainly welcome to visit. I will just be sure and lock up my desk. 😀
See David, it’s not just the ice cream, it was the amount. I won’t embarass myself by saying how much I would eat in one sitting, but let’s just say a quartet of 7 year olds would be quite happy with what I had. 🙂
Joe & Dave,
I remember back in the day doing lawn work while at SWBTS. I could eat all the ice cream I wanted, and did, and not gain weight. Now those were the good old days!
David R. Brumbelow
David and I were members of the “Lawn Rangers” – fighting for Law’n Order around the Metroplex.
When were you guys at SWBTS? ’82-’87 here.
I graduated in 81. But I stayed on working for Brad Sprague’s Lawn Rangers until February of 82.
I was at SWBTS at the Fort Worth campus from 1980 to 1983. I did not complete my degree, however, until 1990, mainly finishing up at the SWBTS Houston campus.
Dave, I’ve heard the DFW area is terribly grown up since we left the Lawn Rangers :-).
David R. Brumbelow
Also, be careful when you take the weight off. Don’t brag too much, because most who take it off, slowly put it right back on. It seems to me to be easier to take it off, than keep it off.
My preacher dad was overweight. On one occasion he had lost a good deal of weight and was naturally pleased with the accomplishment. At an Associational meeting he told one of his overweight preacher friends about losing a few pounds and said, “You know, overeating is a sin.” His preacher friend dryly replied, “I know Joe, so’s pride.”
Being overweight is more of a problem with some than with others. I imagine, however, that we could find some shortcomings in a few skinny preachers as well. I agree that we should all discipline ourselves better, but God still uses overweight preachers. Eli was overweight and a very godly man, though a poor father. Charles H. Spurgeon and D. L. Moody were overweight, and pretty good preachers.
For the record, I’ve cut way back on my eating in recent years and exercise on a fairly regular basis. I still suspect, however, that stress in the life of a minister is one of the main causes of health problems.
David R. Brumbelow
Thanks for sharing your heart here, Pastor.
It is a spiritual battle. It’s like C.S. Lewis writing in the Screwtape Letters about how Christians have given up all vices, yet the appetite for food is the only acceptable one to indulge.
Many of our best friends in the pulpit are on the road a lot, having meetings at meals, going out to eat with visitors or deacons, etc., and it makes it hard to eat right and/or exercise. Many are overworked and have a hard time finding any time for anything outside of ministry.
Thanks for the honesty and sincerity for posting this. I know I’m a little higher than my ideal weight (I was doing well this spring until our baby was born in late April. Having that endless line of people bringing us food for a few weeks really undid all the gains (er…losses) I had made.)
It does influence the message. While we can blame the stress of our jobs for our being overweight, I am convicted by what that says about me more than what the numbers on the scale are. When I am stressed, I apparently turn to food or television or my favorite, food and television…because they give me comfort, pleasure, safety, or control. In essence, instead of being driven by stress into communion with God where I rest in his comfort, control, safety, etc., I run to broken wells of my own making. The problem is never food itself, created by God for our nourishment and enjoyment (and yes, I believe he created oil and breading too for frying!), but in how we use it. The problem with the super-addicted gym rats is not exercise (a great thing), but in how they use it to bottle up anger, or indulge their pride or (well, you get the idea)…
Or to put it a different way, being overweight can be caused by “heart problems”…
I have so much empathy (I’m in trouble, too) for people who struggle with weight control. No excuses on my part, although I am under a physician’s care for thyroid deficiency (but with medication, that is not an ‘excuse’.
I have thought that if I lived alone (God forbid) . . . and was not feeding my husband, then my refrigerator, freezers, and pantries would not so filled with no-no’s . . . (this is NO EXCUSE either).
I like to eat. I am an ‘ethnic’ person, descending from people who celebrate Family with foods and family recipes, most of them calorie-loaded . . . (this also is NO EXCUSE)
I have no excuse. I am over-eating. It is unhealthy. It is self-indulgent in a destructive way. It is wrong.
I think I need help with this. (And even that, is NO EXCUSE)
I have to take personal response-ability for my own behavior.
I needed this post.
Thank you.
I heard a story once (and I’m not 100% sure that it’s true so I will leave out the details) of an SBC seminary professor who after hearing a pretty good sermon in his Preaching Practicum class remarked to the student in front of the whole class something like: “Good job with the text, but if you don’t lose some weight no one is going to be willing to listen to you” (actually in the version I heard it was much harsher than this, but I don’t remember exactly the wording).
I appreciate this post very much because I am beginning to become one of those obese pastors – I weigh more than I ever have in my entire life and I’ve started to have more and more back pain. My wife and I just joined the YMCA and both started on a pretty major diet. This gives me more encouragement to push through on those hard days.
Very encouraging post for a guy who doesn’t struggle
with weight, but with self control as I think most men
do, in some regard (hence Titus 2:6).
Thank you.