I think there’s a union somewhere – the Difficult Deacons Association. They send out one or two to almost every Baptist church (hopefully only one or two). When one member of the DDA moves on, another one is appointed to take his place. I also have had a trickle of folks from the Cantankerous Members Union at my churches.
We get upset about the Difficult Deacons (or Exasperating Elders) or the Cantankerous Members and try to figure out ways to silence them. I’ve actually known of pastors who sought to put such people on church discipline because of their lack of support for his “vision” for the church.
But no ministry is undermined and destroyed by Cantankerous Members, Exasperating Elders, or Difficult Deacons the way it is by fawning supporters who refuse to hold a man of God accountable. The most dangerous man is the one who is constantly affirmed, placed on a pedestal, never challenged, defended by his people no matter how wrong he is, and who is treated as divinity instead of a flawed servant of God.
I do a daily through-the-Bible devotional for my church to get them involved in Bible reading. This year we are taking a chronological approach and recently have been looking at the kings of Judah. It is amazing how many of them started out well and fell into sin in their later years. Why did they fall? Generally, the root cause was pride. Hezekiah was rivaling David as the greatest of kings until he became impressed with his own greatness and splat. Over and over again that story is repeated. Service to God would bring honor from God which would eventually (somehow) inflate the king’s pride and he would then…splat.
Your greatest enemy in ministry is not the guy who snipes at you, the person who challenges you, or the critic who demeans you, it is the applauding masses who think you can walk on water and do no wrong. Your greatest enemies in ministry are those people who will refuse to hold you accountable for your sins and tell you how great you are no matter what you do.
Your passionate supporters make you feel good but they can allow you to become sloppy in spiritual disciplines and still say, “We love you, pastor.” They will allow your heart to drift away from God and still say, “What a great man.”
Of course, I enjoy those people who affirm me more than those who challenge me or even demean me. But if I surround myself with yes-men and women who only applaud my actions and agree with everything I say, I’ve taken the first step toward spiritual self-immolation. If I am wise in my church I will value the opinions of people who disagree with me and who see the world differently. The assumption that my perspective is above challenge is the first step in a prideful fall.
So, thank you God for every Difficult Deacon who has annoyed me, every Cantankerous Member who has challenged me and even made me angry. They have kept me away from the precipice of pride and have reminded me that your wisdom and my wisdom are not the same thing.
Thinking SBC
1. In the SBC, we have to stay away from hero-worship. We have had some great men lead us, but none of them is above sin and none of them is above criticism. The idea that any man, because of what he has done in the past is above censure is ungodly and dangerous. When you adopt such an attitude you are contributing to the destruction of good men. Gratitude and respect are good and godly, but when we refuse to hold men accountable or to see their faults, we have strayed and become enablers of their sin.
2. Too often, we have treated dissent and criticism as if it is the act of an enemy. To question or even criticize an entity or its leaders is not an act of disloyalty and those who do so should not be treated as foes of the gospel or of the entity. There has been much dissent that is clearly ungodly – that hardly needs to be argued. But the act of disagreeing or dissenting from the actions of an entity is not a sinful act and should never be treated as such.
The SBC must do a much better job of this!
3. We need solid, godly leaders at the helms of our entities but we do not need Marvel comic book superheroes. We have to realize that our entity heads are flesh and blood. Men. Imperfect but hopefully men of God. No entity’s future ought to be tied to a man. No man ought to be considered indispensable. We need entity leaders not entity lords. I believe that many/most of our entity leaders get this and understand their place. Sometimes, perhaps, we forget.
How Do You Destroy a Good Man?
1. Heap praise on him for everything he does.
2. Refuse to ever listen to or accept any criticism of anything he does.
3. Attack anyone who would dare to say anything negative about the man.
4. Defend the man vociferously no matter what the accusation. He can do no wrong.
5. Put him on a pedestal of virtue and honor.
Take a good man, subject him to that kind of adulation, and there are few of us who won’t fall into sin.
(Just for clarity, because I know a few of my members read this. I am blessed right now because I have the best group of deacons I’ve had in 35 years of ministry. I wouldn’t call any of them difficult. On the other hand, we meet twice a month for lengthy meetings where were are free to disagree – a right they take full advantage of! I would classify none of these men as members of the DDA and each as a valuable asset to our church!)
This is very sage advice. Leaders often exacerbate the problem by arranging for “yes” men to fill deacon and elder boards. I also believe that having too many people in the religious world on the boards of religious organizations is closely related because they often tend to see things from the position of a pastor or religious staff worker. Frankly, I cannot believe that churches put staff people on elder boards. It places them in an awful position. The pastor has no boss, so to speak. And they are almost duty bound to support their boss, the pastor. I think… Read more »
I am not a fan of secret ballots. People should not be afraid to speak their minds and vote their convictions. I’ve always wondered about someone who would vote differently with a secret ballot and a public vote. If you have the conviction of your conscience, vote what you think is right.
Often times, public votes can result in undue pressure on individuals to conform to the majority, lest they face consequences. I’ve seen the whole “don’t be insubordinate to the elders” and “we want a unanimous decision” thrown out there right before a public vote as a means of discouraging people to vote their conscience.
I do not deny that such CAN happen, but the fact that it does makes the use of a ballot vote a recognition of bad leadership or something dysfunctional. I have been arguing this for 30 years and almost no one agrees with me, so I don’t expect to get support here. But someone with true conviction would vote the same whether ballot or not.
I’d agree in an ideal world without sinful influences that prejudice us. Bad leadership and dysfunction are sadly often present. The secret ballot on controversial decisions works against those aspects of our fallen world.
I personally don’t have a problem voicing my conscience on debatable matters, but its something for me to project that expectation upon others in my congregation who might not have the same type personality.
By the way, shoutout to a fellow PBA alum. You wish you were a fish.
I agree with you Dave.
Dave – I think ‘dysfunctional’ is an accurate description…I’m with you – secret ballots lend themselves to ‘works in the dark.’ At the same time, I have witnessed what JM said about “we want a unanimous decision’ – be used to get people to change their VOTE not necessarily their mind. (GRIN)
“Baptists do not have popes. They never put anybody where they can’t put him down. And another thing; Baptists never ride a horse without a bridle” – J. B. Gambrell, SBC President
Let me say something here. Obviously, the Paige Patterson issue was part of what spurred my thinking here, but it goes beyond that. We have had a culture of a) hero worship and b) suppression of dissent for some time. Both must change.
The fall of Dr. Patterson only brings into sharp relief the need to hold our leaders accountable. This post was certainly influenced by those events but is not simply about those events.
This is THE MOST accurately stated written word of what has happened over the past month, and apparently, years. I was defending Dr P in the beginning of all of this because I know some of those things were taken out of context and media sometimes has the tendency to push one agenda over another. And I did this (defend him) even though I felt it was the right time for him to step down. There have been declines of enrollment and other questions about some decisions made…some public, some not…that say “it’s probably time”. Just because someone has great… Read more »
We are most blessed to have the pastor we have. Some weeks ago he said something with which I disagreed, in a sermon. Later that week i asked him what I should do when that happens, and his reply was “By all means ” to tell him.
We are really blessed.
The US has the secret ballot and has had it since it’s founding. All modern democracies that are free have a secret ballot. The elections at the SBC have secret ballots. Without a secret ballot many people are subject to social pressure from leaders and strong personalities. Because Baptist churches are often run by strong men with big personalities and no secret ballot, we create mini cultures where no one says “No” to the leadership. The only ones who say “no” are cantankerous types because there is no safe place for the average person to say “no” without tremendous social… Read more »
One could argue Louis, that while yes, the citizen’s vote in the United States is done in secret, the votes of those Representatives in Congress we elect are not. Those votes, which have been and should always be public, allow us to determine whether or not those elected representatives should continue in office.
Then we must ask ourselves, in the church and in the convention as a whole, who are the voters and who are the representatives? Who’s vote should be allowed to be secret, and whose need to be open and transparent?
Louis, this is not a ‘let’s fight’ question (although we probably see this differently)….Here’s my question – “You see the church as a democracy?”
I am simply interested to know – is that your point? Thanks..
Jerry: I don’t think we have definitive guidance on church polity. I believe the Bible teaches in a plurality of elders, but I also believe in the Priesthood of each believer. There is a spectrum of polity options and I wouldn’t be critical of churches for their choices in this area. I also don’t believe the Bible teaches anything about how to exercise a voting franchise. But we have 2000 years of history of organizational leadership since Christ died. Because I don’t like manipulation and bullying, and because I like even the most timid person being able to register an… Read more »
Agree about the fight part. My first comment was complimentary of this post.
Actually, the US has NOT had a secret ballot since its beginning at least for the electorate. For years, elections were held with ballots of different colors for different candidates, and sometimes elections were held with voters verbally stating or shouting their choices. The “secret ballot” was originally called the “Australian ballot” because we adopted it from the Aussie’s in the mid- or late-19th Century. But the reason it was adopted was exactly what you and others have said: so voters would not feel undue pressure to conform, and could vote their conscience.
Did not know that. Nicely done!
This article is spot on. I was telling my wife that I was scared the next generation of leaders would face a lot of the same issues finishing well as the current crop. People clamor to be close to power and they’ll brown nose and agree and say yes to anything as long as i means they can be close to the top. We have a new pastor and I am watching people do very strange things just to be associated closely with him.