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Open Mic Night: Share the Punny

January 23, 2014 by Doug Hibbard

After we turned not one but two comment streams a little on the silly side, let’s just go ahead and do this. Preachers are known for bad jokes, cheap puns, and other humour tactics.

So, let’s share a few here. Note: this is about taking a minute and laughing at the truly funny. Save all comments regarding SBC policies, American politics, and anything else serious for some other time and place. Also, ask yourself this question: does Jesus laugh at other people? Humor that mocks ethnicity, disability, or gender has no place in your laugh line, so leave it out. Additionally, if you know a source, source your source. We all know that most of these jokes started one place or another, and we don’t know where we heard them first. Don’t claim one that Jerry Clower told as your own–but don’t stress that you can’t remember where you got it.

You can take Dave’s joke to start with:
Did you guys ever hear the joke about the guy who kept watering down the paint he was using so he could get more out of it. Every time he did, a rain came along and washed the paint away.

Finally, a voice came out of the thunder and said, “Repaint, and thin no more.”

 

Or there’s mine:

The Hill family was on a car tour of Transylvania. The road was wet, though, and the car spun out and hit a tree right in front of Count Dracula’s castle. The Count and his trusty servant, Igor, went out and brought the Hill family in from the scene.

Unfortunately, despite their best efforts, the family passed away.

The Count mournfully went into the music room and began to blast away on the organ, expressing his sorrow in song. Igor noticed that first Mr. Hill, and then Mrs. Hill, seemed to respond to the notes. As the Count continued to play, the family sat up, well and truly amazed.

Igor ran in and shouted, “Master! The Hills are alive to the sound of music!”

 

That’s the worst I’ve got right now. Bring it on.

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About Doug Hibbard

Doug Hibbard is pastor of East End Baptist Church in Hensley, Arkansas. He is married to Ann Hibbard, and is the father of Olivia, Angela, and Steven. Doug graduated from Ouachita Baptist University in the last century, then crammed his 3-year M.Div. into 12 years and 3 schools. He can be found at the local buffet by the pineapple-ham-bacon pizzas. Website Twitter

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