I received this question from one of our readers and I thought I would just put it out there for discussion. It has to do with the counseling ministry.
I’ve been approached by a couple needing marriage counseling, they are not a member of my church and they live about an hour away, I was wondering how some of the commentors including yourself handle counseling of people outside your church?
Do you offer counseling to anyone who asks for help or only to members?
What issues do you tackle yourself and what issues do you refer to professionals?
What kind of counseling do you offer?
I would just like to point people to the excellent work that Faith Church in Lafayette, IN does regarding this question. http://www.faithlafayette.org/church/
Steve Viars spoke at one of my classes last year and I was unbelievably impressed by what their church does as far as counseling people in the community. Of course not every church could pull this off…but their growth has been exponential since they started this. Basically, they provide free counseling on Monday’s to the community. They are consistently training new counselors from within their congregation to do this ministry. It sounds quite awesome.
As for me I’ll offer counseling to any person/couple that truly wants it. I rarely would outsource, only if I truly determine that it is some sort of medical issue or that I feel the person would be better suited for another counselor. But that’s just me.
I believe the counseling ministry can be a powerful way to reach people. My wife co-counsels with me (she is truly blessed with a gift for this and is very involved with a Celebrate Recovery program outside our church). We offer marital counseling to anybody that is seeking it. We have counseled members and non-members and done pre-marital and marital counseling for troubled relationships. We ususally start with a 6 week program we personally developed and go from there based on the individuals’ needs.
We refer to professionals when the matter is serious (this would involve a direct life threatening situatition such as suicidal thoughts or if we see signs of clinical depression) but try to continue biblical counseling alongside the professional help.
Any counseling decision should be considered prayerfully first and bathed in prayer throughout the process. I strongly believe we should not limit counseling strictly to church members, as some of the people who need it most may not be members of a church at all.
Randy
Randy,
I agree with you when you said, “but try to continue biblical counseling alongside the professional help.” I strongly recommend professional help. All counselors should be trained to recognize the serious problems and know good professionals to recommend to even if they are not Christian, though prefered. Being a type of paraclete is what is needed in order to keep their spirit alive and trusting.
“Spiritual direction” and “counseling” . . . are these considered as separate, blended, or the same ?
I am not a pastor, so I will only ask a question: It would be prudent to check whether the couple already has membership at a church where counseling is offered, yes? And if so, whether they have permission from their leadership to seek counselling elsewhere?
Chase, are Southern Baptist people required by their Church to get permission to seek marital counseling in another venue, if it is offered at their own Church ?
I would think that ‘privacy’ might be a concern for a couple. Marital counseling sometimes involves very personal concerns for a couple which they might want to ‘keep to themselves’ rather than open to the examination of non-professional counselors in their own Church. It would seem to me that forcing them into the position of having to their marital pain within their own Church might deter them from seeking help at all.
correction:
“It would seem to me that forcing them into the position of having to share their marital pain within their own Church might deter them from seeking help at all.”
Christiane,
If it is a matter within the church’s oversight, upon which their own church could adequately counsel them, I think that they should have a legitimate reason for going elsewhere (especially to another church), ideally with their elders’ blessing.
I think that’s a great question, Chase. The reality is, though, that a person who is prominent in a community (especially a church) could avoid getting help out of fear of the information leaking. By going out-of-town for counseling, that possibility is at least diminished due to lack of interconnections with the “home” community and the long-distance counselor.
I’d also echo previous comments on “professional” help. Baptists often act like Christian Scientists when it comes to mental disorders, often treating them as essentially moral in nature. While it might be possible that SOME of them are caused by sin, some are essentially organic and are “in the wiring” so to speak.
Anyone offering counseling should be knowledgeable of the limits of his or own professional capabilities and refer aggressively outside of those limits if for no other reason than to contain liability exposure for the congregation you’re associated with.
Also seriously consider an umbrella liability policy. I have used one to cover both my full-time employment and part-time consulting. For me they’re around $200 a year for $2 million of coverage in general liability including professional liability.
Note: I am not a lawyer, I am not a pastor, I am not a mental health professional, and I am not an insurance salesman. 😉
Chase, great question!
Greg, fabulous practical advise!
Our church has two full-time professional counselors on staff and my brother is a member of Calvary Baptist in Winston-Salem where Gary Chapman, of Christian counseling renown, is currently the interim Senior Pastor. However, having these kinds of counseling resources is not possible for most churches and both of you provide some great food for thinking about guidelines for sharing counseling resources.
I know that our counselors will see people inside and outside of our congregation under normal professional counseling ethical and legal guidelines. The church underwrites their cost (within reason) for our congregation, but they accept fees from people outside of our congregation. So there is a natural priority to the local church. But in every case they practice according to what the law governs (they are licensed and obligated to specified confidentiality, etc) so that they are covered.
Because of this, I would recommend learning what the law in your state entails with regard to clergy counseling so that you don’t set yourself up for legal ramifications.
Otherwise, if I were a pastor I wouldn’t turn anyone away from outside as long as I could afford the time from ministering to my own church. I think it’s a tremendous opportunity to build up a marriage to be in the name of Christ if they don’t have any other good resources available to them.
I have counseled people outside my church, but not often. I could see where it could get too time consuming.
I let them know I’m not a “professional” counselor.
I see no reason for a pastor to get into the deep, dark details; especially regarding sexual problems. In cases like that I’d recommend you recomend a good book (like Ed Wheat, etc.) and / or refer them to a professional counselor; hopefully a Christian Counselor. Otherwise, you’re asking for trouble.
Focus on the Family recommends Christian Counselors that are located across the country. Also, some Baptist Associations, State Conventions, and larger churches have professional counselors available.
David R. Brumbelow
Reality: The last group a couple would want to know about their marital or kid or family problems is their church family; hence, they try and find a counselor some distance removed. If they call their pastor, show up for an appointment with the pastor in front of the church secretary, staff, janitor word will get around.
Restricting pastoral counseling to only members ignores this reality.
Can meetings not be held privately? Or the gossipers properly disciplined? I understand the sad reality that members are wary of entrusting problems to their elders, but they are nonetheless under their elders’ spiritual oversight and leadership. Are there not steps which can be taken to create a more trustworthy environment?
The way my wife and I handle this is that we counsel in our home. This removes any stigma from somebody seeing somebody at church in a “counseling session.” I am bi-vocational so I pretty much maintain all my resources at home and this may not be as convenient for a full time pastor. Personally, I find the setting in our home much more comfortable for the people we counsel with as it sets them more at ease.
Randy
If I was a pastor I would only counsel people referred to me by another pastor if they were outside the church. I would not counsel someone that was not part of the church of my responsibility.
If I was a pastor I would focus on discipling my deacons and others at the start of my ministry. That discipleship would be to mature them in the Word and learn to develop and use their spiritual gift(s). Future counseling would allow me to assimilate the ones counseled with those who could take them under their wing and nurture them in the area of weakness. I would pray extensively for discernment so the counsel would be most effective.
Early in my marriage I went to a pastor for counsel. After we talked the pastor/layman relationship was completely different and I chose never to seek counsel again. I threw myself in God’s word and kept my mouth shut. I allowed time to pass in order to be able to determine the difference in right or wrong, best or least and good or evil. Over the years I have learned that with time, God’s eternal plan unfolds just as He planned it for me. I see every event in my life that would normally demand counsel as an event that shapes my soul for the Kingdom. “It is enough that Jesus died, and that He died for me.”
Don’t get me wrong, we all need counsel sometimes. My hope that all counselors recognize is that people are better off learning to stand on something besides their own two feet.
I pretty much talk to anyone who calls me and asks for advice. However, in researching risk management as we were writing personnel policies for the church, I came across some information that might apply.
We need to be very careful about using the term “counselling” because that implies a level of professionalism and even certification that most pastors don’t have. We attempt to apply biblical principles to life situations, but are not trained or licensed therapists. I think bibiical advice is superior to the counselling offered most places, but we need to make sure people know we aren’t therapists or licensed counselors – for liability sake.
It is often best not to use the word counselling for that reason. At least that is what we were advised.
We have a statement in our policies that says that we are not licensed therapists, but are simply attempting to apply biblical principles to real life situations.
Technical, just thought I might throw that in here.
First caution is that ministers need to be careful calling themselves “counselors.” That is a legally defined term and there are standards that govern who is qualified to “counsel” a person. Pastors are probably best suited to say they are offering “Biblical Counsel” and make sure that is clear in printed materials and conversation with members and non-members.
Relative to giving Biblical counsel to non-members of a church … if a person is a member of your church there are several expectations related to that membership … expectations not present for a non-member. For instance, there may be issues of spiritual discipline that cannot be followed through on if not a member (obviously there are issues of confidentiality too). There is also the issue of accountability to spiritual leadership in a congregation that is not present with a non-member (who is obviously not in covenant with the congretation).
Many pastors would like to meet with anyone as a way to build a bridge to them, as time permits. That may be a door that can be opened (especially in small communities), but my two cents worth is that you might offer Biblical Counsel or direction for a limited few sessions. Unless you are trained and licensed in your state as a professional counselor, get a commitment from the person(s) to follow through on your referral after a maximum of two or three sessions. This allows you to initiate and build a relationship with them but not get into areas beyond ability and training. It will also help a pastor manage their time. After professional counseling is started, additional contact can be made to maintain some Biblical counsel.
I am willing to counsel people from other churches, as there is no Baptist church polity which requires someone to have permission from their home church before seeking help elsewhere. However, I make it clear that what i do is (1) pastoral counseling, and (2) it is in the nature of 9-1-1 help, i.e., in matters requiring immediate and/or short-term attention. For anything long term or that proves to be of a nature I am not qualified to address, I refer people to professional counselors. In the Baptist Convention of Maryland & Delaware, we are fortunate to have the ministry of CentrePoint Counseling, which is Christ-based and utilizes Christian professionals. They strategically provide counselors in various parts of the state, and help keep costs down by using donated space in churches.
John
I know in our church, our pastor has stated he does only “bandaid” counseling. And really sticks to “biblical counseling”. But we do have a counseling center at the church, with two degreed professional counselors. One is a lady who was called into this ministry through some considerable tragedy, and her objective is not to produce family income. The other is a firefighter, who feels called into the profession, and handles a few cases on his days off from his career.
It has been a most worthwhile ministry for our church.