I still remember a good chunk of advice that one of my professors in college gave me. Dr. Pelletier (not the skater) was a man that taught me a great deal about ministry. Perhaps one of the most profound things he taught me was about family devotions. I was single at the time but engaged to my wife Nikki. I was freaking out about how to lead this woman.
The weight of Ephesians 5 was pressing hard on me; what does it mean to wash her in the water of the word? What does it mean to lead a family? I had never really seen family devotions modeled and had no idea what it meant to lead my spouse the way that Jesus would—much less how to lead the children that God would bless us with a few years later.
Dr. Pelletier’s advice to me was simple yet profound. With eyes filled with wisdom that came from years of experience he calmly reassured me and said, “Love Jesus and share that with her”.
That’s it. No magical formula. Love Jesus and share it.
Ten years later I am still chewing on that advice and trying to live it out. In fact as I am reading through Augustine this morning I see not only how grounded in history Dr. Pelletier’s advice was but also how far reaching it is. Turns out this isn’t just good advice for marriage but also for ministry. Consider this from Augustine:
“I go to feed myself so that I can give you to eat. I am the servant, the bringer of food, not the master of the house. I lay out before you that from which I also draw my life.”
Kind of reminds me of John Owen’s, “If the Word does not dwell with power in us, it will not pass with power from us.” All the great preachers (that can truly be called great because they point us so well to the source of all delight) seem to have one thing in common—their preaching, teaching, ministering, etc. is but an overflow of their private devotion and single-minded love for Jesus.
This is why the advice to one ministerial candidate is so powerful:
“I’m not interested to know if you can set the Thames on fire. What I want to know is this: If I picked you up by the scruff of the neck and dropped you into the Thames, would it sizzle?”
I am responsible for shepherding people and discipling them to disciple others. This really makes it simple. Love Jesus then share it. Of course it’s taken me ten years and I’m still chewing on exactly what that means and how to love Jesus more and how to effectively share it…but the foundation it built remains firm.
I’m convinced that any sort of ministerial training, preaching practicum’s, books on ministry, resources on marriage, seminar’s, etc., are only distractions and given to self-bloating if they are not grounded in this simple truth—“Love Jesus then share it”.
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I’ve also found that the best way to disciple people is to be drunk on Calvinism in a liberal church doing a Mark Driscoll Bible study.
Well in that case, I guess I’ll have to respond… I think the heathen around here are actually drunk on an SEC victory in an all-SEC title game… poor fellows in desperate need of salvation…
But seriously…
It’s good advice and I think it ties in w/ Deuteronomy 6 as well–which of course is mainly about parents and children, but nonetheless, the home life should be saturated with the word–walking, sitting, lying down, rising up…
If our lives are saturated with communication with God in reading/hearing (and doing!) his word and talking with him in prayer, then the natural outcome will be loving our wives, our children, our churches, and leading them to greater depths of love for and holiness in Jesus…
It’s not a far-out-there ideal when Psalm 1 tells us “blessed is the man whose delight is in the law of the Lord and on his law he meditates day and night.” It is rather the foundational ground for doing everything else, especially if we are to do everything else for the glory of God.
As usual, the posts that need the most reads/discussions don’t get them.
Good post, Mike. Very challenging reminder that we can’t disciple people to love Jesus if we don’t.
That was great advice to love Jesus. That is our focus. We seldom think that our lives influence and lead better through example than trying to “do” what others have given in a “how to” list. It works with triaining children and leading churches, too.
“nor as being lords over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock;” 1 Peter 5:3
What a great principle. Many try to “train” their children, wifes and churches in the way they should go but fail miserably because they are not the example. It is the natrual way we train everyone we influence. Keeping our eyes on the author and finisher of our faith will have a greater effect on those around us.
I needed that today.
I grew up in a home were family “devotions” were mandated morning and night – usually regardless of the circumstances. Late for school – you’ll just be later, worked until 2am – get up for devotions and then go back to sleep. I know, and now somewhat appreciate, that my dad took this discipline so seriously but it has caused many, many difficulties with me in leading my own family. Either I felt like I wasn’t doing enough or I felt like I was turning into my dad.
As God was leading me a few weeks ago I came to this conclusion; I have no desire to replicate my dad’s behavior in a family where three kids are playing basketball and our schedule is as hectic as anyone else’s. However, I will make a consistent effort to sit down with my children at least two times a week as a group and will take advantage of the individual opportunities as they present themselves.
I read this tonight shortly after we finished our time together. What a gracious God we serve!
Daniel,
Thanks for sharing. You bring up an interesting point that “hyper-spirituality” may at times be more dangerous than non-spirituality.
I’m glad you were encouraged by this post.
I read this earlier today and didn’t have the time to comment then. Just wanted to say a hearty AMEN.
Again, if we were where we should be, there’d probably be more discussion of an article like this, but instead we argue Calvinism and alcohol to the end.
Great article, once again, Mike.