The new year is a good time to reflect on our past and choose to make life changes. Social networking has become a huge part of people’s lives and perhaps now is a good time to think about our online presence and suggest a few changes. Read this as helpful pastoral advice or as my personal pet peeves. Feel free to change them into your New Year’s Resolutions.
- That news story, internet tip, food contamination scare, new gang initiation, IS NOT TRUE!!! (Yes, I meant to shout; see point 6 below). Make snopes.com your new friend and research before you post.
- Do you know what “satire” is? Don’t share your outrage over what you read at theonion.com.
- When you share a photo from someone else’s page or profile, note that you are also sharing the caption. I’m not sure you really meant to say that. Look before you share.
- The stats, quotes and “facts” on your meme may support your political position, but not when they are grossly exaggerated, taken out of context, or completely fabricated. Check to see that what you are presenting is true before you share it.
- The meme you just shared is really funny! – It’s also from a page named “&*%!#$es of the world unite.” Is that the really the message you want to send to your grandma?
- People don’t like being shouted at in real life, so don’t shout at them online. Don’t use ALL CAPS unless you mean to shout, which should be rare; make that never (sorry about point #1 – I apologize for shouting at you).
- People don’t like being nitpicked in real life, so don’t do it publicly on line. If you has to really be the grammar police, at least have the curtesy to not to do it on my wall. Send corrections in a private message or bite you’re tung. I will prolly still be annoyed, but at least I’m not being made fun of in public.
- You took English in high school right? You don’t have to follow all the punctuation rules, but have a heart for the rest of us and at least speak intelligibly.
- TMI (too much information), I really did not need to know that (or worse, see it)!
- Not enough information. I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about. A little context, please?
- People are much more bold, rude, crass, etc. online than they would be in public. I’ve got news for you: your FB posts are in public for all to see! If you would not say it in person, don’t say it online (and never post when angry).
- In a discussion or debate, your words may sound more angry, annoyed, assertive or rude than you intend. Choose your words carefully.
- People often sound more angry, annoyed, assertive, or rude online than they really intend. Don’t assume emotion; take words at face value.
- Do not try to resolve conflicts by text, instant message, or comment stream. I know you don’t want to, but talk to the person face to face or at least pick up the phone.
- Talk-to-text technology is great, but be careful when you use it. You never know what your phone might do. Check before you send.
- Your constant corrections of talk-to-text mistakes are annoying and wearying. Unless I can’t figure out what you meant to say, just leave the mistake uncorrected, please.
- Angry cryptic posts are not as cryptic as you think. I know you’re talking about me, and even if you’re not, you are. Just don’t.
- I have 855 friends and I don’t live on FB. Please don’t assume I saw the last sentence of your three paragraph post from six months ago. If it’s that important that I know, personal messages are still best.
- I hate group messages. Unless it’s truly a group conversation, please message me individually or count me out.
- I’m glad you are having a party this Saturday and I’d love to come. But please don’t make me “decline” your invitation when I live 1600 miles away.
- I don’t need a play-by-play of the big game in my news feed. I’m watching it too (or else I’m not interested). One or two posts will do, thank you.
- Admit it, you clicked on that video because the picture was a girl in a bikini. You got suckered into watching the clip and now everyone knows it because it posted your status for you.
- I friended you because you’re my friend, not because I want to buy products from you or join your multi-level marketing scheme. Please don’t post constant advertisements as your status and don’t hijack my page by posting ads on my wall.
- I’m pretty self-conscious about how I look in pictures and I don’t want my bad hair day or embarrassing moment frozen in time for all to see. Please ask permission before you post pictures of someone else.
- I have absolutely no interest in playing the latest FB game. Please stop inviting me to play.
- I’m not against selfies, but there’s a fine line between playfulness and narcissism. Every once in a while, post a picture of something else, please.
- I don’t need another picture of Gene Wilder on my wall. Thanks anyway. 🙂
- Do you really need an emoticon on every post? :):):):) – Sometimes words are enough. 😛
- I took time out of my schedule to spend some personal quality time with you, not watch you check your twitter feed. It’s ok to put the phone away sometimes (you won’t die, I promise).
- I’m sitting right next to you, son. Really?!?
- Don’t forget that you friended your mom and your pastor. Just sayin’.
- It’s a beautiful day – log off and enjoy it!
These are just a few of my ideas. Feel free to share your own social networking advice in the comments below. I may just turn them into a few New Year’s Resolutions of my own!
