In about 9 days, Ramadan will kick off for Muslims around the world.
Ramadan is the Muslim holy month, the same month during which the Quran was given to the Prophet. During the month, Muslims eat breakfast before their dawn prayers. They fast all day, give to the poor, and seek to live moral lives since immoral acts breaks the fast. They attend special prayers at the mosques and then, around sunset, they break their fast by eatings dates. The person who pays for the dates earns credit with Allah. The group feasts well into the night on various dishes, usually with family and their closest friends. They close the month with a three-day festival and feast.
Where we work here in Central Asia, the Deaf community can be fairly tightly-knit. Often, instead of gathering with unintelligible hearing families, the various circles of Deaf friends will meet to break their fast with dates, tons of food, and hours of chatting. Those gathered range from devoutly Muslim to functional atheists who enjoy their Muslim cultural heritage.
So here’s the $64,000 question: if my Deaf buddy invites me to eat with them during an evening meal, do I go?
It gets awkward because this is a conformist culture, and they have no experience with someone who does not go along with the Muslim habits of the majority. So when someone prays, everyone assumes a certain posture; the dirty looks we get when we don’t go along at other events are pretty nasty. When they eat a date to break their fast and I theoretically join them, I’m obeying the Prophet’s example. When I wait for the signal to eat, I’m complying with the expectations of the Prophet. As well, there’s an assumption that we’re all basically Muslims here, and so if you’re present you must be cool with all of this.
On the other hand, these are great relationship moments; the eating, the talking, the hanging out for a few hours. We might find ways to share the gospel, though it’s dicey telling Muslims about Jesus during the most Muslim month of the year.
Would you advise your church members to attend? Remember – I’m not in the US where more pluralistic standards apply; I’m in a Muslim nation which assume that even the most uncommitted resident has a basic respect for the Prophet’s mandates.
Well? Do I go?
GO! As a follower of Isa! I would think that your very presence is an opening for the gospel. Explain how your faith in Christ has freed you from any restriction with whom you eat.
I understand the dilemma, but would emphatically fall on the side of no; you do not go. Relationship building by undermining the testimony to truth and “going along” with a false religion is no relationship built.
Truth is to be spoke for the transformation of the hearers, not the catharsis of the speakers. Your theology should not ever get in the way of ministry…
Reminds me a lot of Peter’s meal with Cornelius….
Agreed, the message is for the hearer and not the speaker. However, the ability to faithfully proclaim Christ to a group that will conflate Christianity with Islam (regardless of the level that Islam is cultural and not faithful) is dangerous. This is the discussion of freedom Paul was getting at. Ethan is free to eat, but is he wise to do so? In this case it is the “hope of ministry” against actual ministry not theology vs. ministry. Which by the way is a false dichotomy as all of my ministry is built upon my theology. Your second sentence is dangerously close to the ends justifying the means theology.
I also see less than zero comparison to Cornelius. Cornelius was a faithful follower of God (Acts 10:1 – 2) who did not know Christ. In that case the message was for both the hearer (Cornelius) and for the preacher (Peter) as the latter would never have expected the Holy Spirit to fall upon the Gentiles. These attenders are those who we would hope to hear the Gospel. Can they only hear it at these meals? Of course not. Could the message be undermined and the testimony of the preacher be hurt by “cultural assumption”? Yes, yes it could.
Ethan, I thank God that you are living among Muslims whom you care about and that you long to share Christ’s love with them!
I understand your dilemma well. Together with my wife and daughter, I lived in a Muslim majority nation for 14 years. Before I share some advice, let me stop and pray for you.
Lord, please shine the light of Christ brightly through Ethan. We ask that through him and other believers, many Muslims will be drawn to Christ and saved by your grace. Heavenly Father, You promise wisdom for those who ask it. Ethan is asking for wisdom concerning some specific issues and opportunities. We join in his prayer for wisdom and guidance. We also ask that you will protect Ethan and other Christians who live among Muslims from evil of every type. We are thankful that most Muslim neighbors are friendly and wish their Christian neighbors no harm, yet we realize that there are radicals among them who do sometimes attack their Christian neighbors. We ask that You will work for your glory among Muslims both during Ramadan and throughout the year. Lord, finally, I ask that my advice will be helpful and if it’s not a good fit for Ethan and his situation that you will show him that. In Jesus Name, Amen.
Here’s my advice:
Don’t hesitate to join “breaking the fast meals” with your Muslim friends. The opportunities to show God’s love for them, and perhaps even respectfully share the gospel (if not right then, later) far outweighs the risk of them misunderstanding your attendance as a confirmation of Islamic beliefs.
I went so far as to participate in the fast some years. I fasted with a different reason then they did. I focused on drawing close to God and praying for the gospel to spread among my Muslim friends. I kept the same fasting hours and basically the same rules (no food or drink during fasting hours), but fasted with a different reason. In my case, I always felt that God blessed me and His work during these times. I felt that when I fasted, instead of being the most difficult time to share Christ, Ramadan became one of the most open times to do so.
I don’t believe God’s answer is the same for each person in this type of decision. There is no direct, explicit command in Scripture one way or the other. So feel free to follow the guidance you sense from God, and don’t let others judge you if your choices are different from theirs.
If you want to chat privately about this, let me know.
One last thing. After being back in the US for 8 years, we finally have an opportunity to return and visit the nation we love for a few weeks. Due to many factors, the only good time for us to go is during Ramadan. We will be leaving two weeks from tomorrow. We hope to see both Christian and Muslim friends. So as I pray for you, please also pray for me and my family on this trip.
Grace and Peace, Mark
Based on my understanding of 1 Corinthians 10:14-33, I would say no. Your refusal to participate will make a greater statement than your presence. May God bless you with wisdom to consider all these comments and do what is right in His sight.
It appears to me that 1 Cor 10:14–33 points in the opposite direction. After laying out the points to take into consideration, Paul offers the practical conclusion in v. 27: “If one of the unbelievers invites you to dinner and you are disposed to go, eat whatever is set before you without raising any question on the ground of conscience.” The exception is whenever someone is liable to misinterpret your participation as an endorsement of their idolatry (vv. 28–29). But as long as you feel your hosts understand that you are not there to participate in the idolatrous aspect of what is happening, but rather as a friend and neighbor accepting their hospitality, it appears to me Paul is saying, “Go ahead and accept the invitation, and don’t let your oversensitive conscience get the better of you on issues like this.”
I live in a Muslim country and would support you going.
Let your friend know of your respect for him but that as a Christian you cannot participate in Muslim prayers. Ask him if this would be offensive to him and if it is, graciously bow out because you in no way went to offend or embarrass him. If it gets this far, ask if you can talk more deeply bout your held beliefs so he can better understand you… with hope He will come to see Jesus as you do.
Ramadan is early this year. Ready for it. Things really slow down here during Rmdan.
Ethan, most of the missionaries that I know do accept these invitations. It is a great way to make friends and initiate conversations about the gospel. When you go, explain to your host that you don’t know what to do. I believe you’ll find that they will be patient and tolerant and happy to explain. My wife and I served in a predominantly Muslim country for some years. I’ve received invitations to attend Ramadan dinners, and it was common in our country for Muslims to invite Hindu and Buddhist neighbors, also.
Why don’t you just say to your friend, “Thank you so much. I would really enjoy coming. Is it possible for me to come and enjoy the feast, but not participate in prayer? Would that be offensive?” You could tell him that you would be praying to God the Father through his son Jesus Christ.
Then you could see what his answer would be.
If he said it was a good thing for you to come anyway, he could let people know why you are not praying when they pray.
It’s up to you, however.
For me, I would not feel comfortable getting in a Muslim position of prayer – giving the appearance that I am praying with them when I am not.
I would think that eventually you would be asked, “Are you a practicing Muslim or seeking to become one?”
When you say “No. I am not praying to Alah when you do, but am praying to God the Father through Jesus the Son”, they might be upset that you were giving a different impression.
Please forgive me if I don’t understand the particulars. I am trying to reason through this with the facts as I understand them.
I wish you the best in figuring this out!
For anyone interested, last year I wrote a short blog post “What is Ramadan and What Should Christians Do?” It does not directly address the question asked in the OP, but I hope some will find it helpful and encouraging:
http://parresiazomai.blogspot.com/2017/05/what-is-ramadan-and-what-should.html
Go, unless it violates your conscience. You probably already worship on Friday rather than Sunday and have to do that because of where you are. If this is a good opportunity to open the door to share the Gospel, take it. You aren’t worshiping Allah. You are dining with sinners in need of the Savior. I pray you can be a light in the darkness there.
Thanks for the input, folks.
I have three teammates here. One says he’ll go if invited. Another says no way. The third has her hands full with babies and hasn’t answered.
Would anyone’s answers change if I were living in Charlotte, NC or Nashville?
My answer might, as the concern of syncretism would be less of an issue. Of course if you were in the Bible-belt, syncretistic thinking might be an even bigger concern.
Not mine. Just the invite would still be an opportunity to open the door for a discussion.
We have so many Muslim expats here that the government sets up tents for Iftar.
I have never been invited to Iftar but I have been to a few Muslim dinners to meet and greet different religious leaders in the country.
I love living internationally.
For those who are unaware, iftar is the meal that breaks the fast at the end of the day. Dates (usually) must be the first thing eaten, and around here honor is often granted to the one who sponsors the iftar, whether the meal itself or just the expense of the dates.
In the past, my wife and I have been to Muslim memorials for the dead and confusion reigned when we simply sat or stood among the group as they held their hands out in a gesture of Muslim prayer. Some folks got angry at the disrespect and unconformity, despite the clear notion that we are not followers of the Prophet. The assumption seemed to be we should have done the “right thing” anyway. Interestingly, tolerance seemed to split along gender lines. Women were far less understanding than the men.
Again … Jesus did the things He did irrespective of location.
What did Jesus do when invited to eat with publicans and tax collectors?
My brother converted (from nothing) to Judaism so marry a Jewish girl. I was asked to hold up one corner of the Chuppah during the ceremony. I asked my pastor what I should do and he said He’d bet Jesus would have done it. So I did.
i say do.
My answer is not location dependent. It would not change based on location.
Hi Ethan – writing from another Central Asian nation with 25 years experience in the region. I also was born and raised by Baptist workers in Pakistan my first 18 years.
I agree with David Rogers if:
1) You are settled in your own conscience.
2) If you are ready to make no compromise in presenting yourself as a follower of Jesus, a respected identity according to the Quran (and you should be familiar with all of the Quran verses that put you in that category)
3) That you see your obligation in this context to act like Jesus, using metaphor and parable and questions to draw them into a conversation about their own beliefs vis a vis Jesus and fasting and the whole universe of wonderful conversations that Muslims easily talk about. Invite them to convince you of their beliefs without backing down one second on who you are and where you stand. In all my years with Muslims it is much easier to talk to them about Jesus than it is not to. And they will see right through you if you pretend otherwise by your silence and they will wonder why you are pretending.
If you are not ready to talk about Jesus to your Muslim friends, then you should not go. But let them be drawn in to the conversation by your questions to them and answer their questions with questions just like Jesus often did.
Blessings!
Stan Brown