This is not social commentary. It’s a simple question.
Iowa is about to get hit by a winter blast tonight – I mean the real deal. It’s gonna get so cold that even real churches are considering closing! The liberal churches close all the time here in Siouxland at the slightest weather provocation. They cancel like SEC area churches. But right now it’s about 2 degrees and wind chills are somewhere around 30 below. By the time our Sunday School hour starts tomorrow morning, the actual temperature is expected to be somewhere around 20 below.
For you limited education and experience folks – that is VERY cold. Think of it this way. Is there much difference between 82 degrees and freezing? Of course there is. Okay. Start at freezing, go down that SAME 50 degrees of difference and that is around 20 below. If you have never experienced it, it is hard to describe. The air feels like it is stabbing your lungs. Exposed skin starts to freeze almost instantly. Will my truck start? Honestly, it’s a good question. My wife’s car in the garage probably will.
So, what prompted all of this? A weather report that went across the screen this morning, warning us about the expected temperatures tomorrow got me wondering about the general intelligence of the American people.
Temperatures in this range could make outdoor activities potentially dangerous.
Really? REALLY? And I was thinking of opening the pool for an early morning swim! I’m glad they gave me this advice.
A few weeks ago I got my third new Samsung, this one a non-exploding Galaxy S7-Edge. With that I got the Gear VR – virtual reality headgear. It’s a lot of fun. But as I opened it up and read the instructions I saw this warning.
Please do not drive while wearing the Samsung Gear VR.
Again, REALLY? It’s a bad idea to drive while wearing a set of goggles that completely block your view? Who knew?
Of course, we live in a world where irons come with warnings telling us not to iron our clothes while we are wearing them. I’ve made some dumb mistakes in my life, I really have. I’ve done some things where afterward my companions and I looked at each other and said, “That was really stupid.” But I’ve never thought about ironing my clothes without first removing them from my corpulent self.
Here is one I thought was a great piece of wisdom.
I was cutting some brush a few weeks ago, and as I started up the chainsaw and I thought to myself, which side should I hold? Should I grab the end with the rounded plastic handles or the side with the sharp, rotating chain that will mangle my body?
It was a tough choice, but I saw the warning label decided against grabbing the sharp end. Thank goodness.
You can google “stupid warning labels” and find them. Some of them are so bizarre and inappropriate I can’t or won’t copy them here. But they have in common the fact that in a world of mildly intelligent people they simply would not be necessary.
Check out this beauty from a jetski users manual. 
When you need to find out how much fuel is in your vehicle, have you ever lit a match and taken a look? Flicked your Bic? With flashlights on just about everything electronic today?
Here’s one that totally baffled me. This is prescription medicine for a dog. It says so right on the bottle. DOG. Big letters. The warning label then says that the effect of the medicine may be intensified by the use of alcohol. I’ve never had a drink in my life, though I don’t share the strict abstentionist interpretation of Scripture, but do people often mix medications with alcohol…for their pets? Is pet alcoholism a big problem anyway?
That is just the beginning of the problem in this label though. It goes on to say that the one taking the medicine should not drive or operate heavy machinery after taking the drug. Does your dog drive? Frankly, if your dog drives, I don’t much care whether he’s taken the medication with alcohol or without it, or not at all. A dog operating a motor vehicle or heavy machinery is an issue unto itself.
This next one saved one of our grandchildren. We were babysitting and needed to bathe the little whippersnapper. I thought, hey, we’ve got a washer and dryer. How easy would that be, quick and efficient. But then I read the warning label.
My grandchild is most definitely a person, so I found a different way to cleanse the little booger. Thank goodness for that warning label. Who knows what might have happened.
When did we get stupid? When did we become a society that needed a warning to do what common sense should command?
When did we become a people who needed warnings not to wear VR goggles while driving or hold the sharp ends of chainsaws? I realize that many of these warnings are simply meant to protect companies from lawsuits, but do Iowans need people telling us that when it’s 20 below you should probably cancel your picnic plans?
Really?
Anyone up for a round of golf after church tomorrow?
