I think it started with the best of intentions. A preacher I held in great esteem drank deeply from the cup of alliteration. If it was beneficial for him, why not me?
Slowly, I began with simple sermonic points (rich, real, relevant) but the thing began to grip me and I spiraled down into secondary alliterative points (the route he chose, the result he gained, the reason he perished) and then, I’m ashamed to admit it, total depravity in the form of double alliteration (His life of luxury, his lament of languor, his lash of lambaste).
I’m not proud of spending more time searching for synonyms that plumbing the depths of the Scriptures for truth. I’m not bragging about inserting absurd words in a main sermon point just to get the sound right.
Brethren, there was a time when I thought the concept enlarged my mind! The horror!
I began to be enlightened, extricated, encouraged, and emancipated from alliteration a couple of decades ago. Thank God I’ve been sermonically sober for all that time since.
Oh, sure, I take small sips socially. I can handle that. You may not have the cast-iron constitution and strength, sturdiness, and soundness of will that I have, so I recommend total abstinence. Go the route of complete and total sobriety. Don’t take the first move towards the siren song of sermonic alliteration and you’ll not end up dashed on the shoals of silliness.
And, brethren, it’s not too late to turn back.
